Better Because of the Journey: What Recovery Taught Me

Michael first joined the Unshame NC campaign through his courageous willingness to share his story. As our very first story sharer in North Carolina, we were truly grateful for his time and transparency. From the beginning, he has emphasized the importance of community and connection—pillars that have guided his own recovery journey. Today, Michael works as an attorney and an advocate for those in his community affected by substance use disorder (SUD). We are honored to have Michael share his perspective on what Unshame NC and sharing his story mean to him. 

The nonprofit Shatterproof and the North Carolina Department of Health and Human Services (NCDHHS) recently launched Unshame North Carolina – a campaign to reduce stigma for those impacted by substance use disorder (SUD). It’s a cause that I support because I am a person living in recovery from SUD.  

That story goes back 20 years to a teenager in the foothills trying to fit in, partying on the weekends, and experimenting with substances. Prescription pills were easy to come by at the time. My friends and I started using them recreationally and soon it became hard to stop.  

At first, the substances made my shy personality more outgoing, but they became a crutch. My grades suffered. Relationships deteriorated. I was under the influence for much of college and early into law school, and then in 2011, I woke up in jail.  

Recovery wasn’t easy those first weeks and months. From withdrawal to counseling to drug testing and job interviews, it was a hard journey to better days. But somehow, I managed to finish school, pass the bar exam, and get sworn-in to practice law.  

It helped to have goals and things to look forward to. I listened to movie soundtracks for motivation, took long walks, and with the extra time, read more books. I was also very fortunate – benefiting from the help of the Lawyer Assistance Program and from the North Carolina Board of Law Examiners, the local district bar, and Billy McElwee at the McElwee Firm in North Wilkesboro who were willing to give me an opportunity.  

In the words of Robert Frost, “Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.” And back in Wilkes County, there were folks who were there for me (parents, friends, neighbors, other attorneys), and “third places” to go to that gave truth to the quote from Johann Hari, that “the opposite of addiction is connection.”  

Thanks to that support system I got back on my feet, practicing law in the same courtroom where I had once stood as a defendant, serving on numerous nonprofit boards, and eventually becoming president of the local community foundation. It was a powerful story of redemption and one that I mostly kept secret out of shame.  

That’s what stigma does. It puts up barriers. It passes judgment. It makes a comeback all the more challenging. And that’s the real shame.  

Over time, I came to realize that the worst thing to happen in my life was actually the best. Recovery taught lessons about character and resilience. There were mistakes along the way, but I also developed a deep sense of empathy, gratitude, and perspective on who and what really matter in life.  

The person I became is not in spite of what happened. It’s because of it. And that’s why we should work to end the stigma associated with people who use or have used substances: not to do them a favor, but to do ourselves one. The best employees, mentors, and leaders are those who have been through something and, in the words of Hemingway, are “strong at the broken places.”  

We need folks like me back in the workforce, back in our lives, and out of the shadows of society. That means making it easier to get a job, join the military, find housing, or get back on the road. It also means increasing awareness of SUD and the various treatment options, which is part of the work of the Unshame North Carolina campaign.  

We often think of America’s drug epidemic as just an overdose crisis. But it’s bigger than that. According to the baseline survey conducted by Shatterproof prior to launching the Unshame NC campaign, 57 percent of North Carolinians know someone with opioid use disorder.  Yet only 33% of North Carolinians know how to find quality treatment. Across the state there are thousands of people we care about who have dealt with SUD. What will happen to them? That’s up to us. I was lucky to find support, and I shouldn’t be an exception.  

I got to a better place and am better because of that journey. We can do that for others. And that starts by ending the stigma of what our friends and neighbors are going through.  

To learn more about what you can do to support people with SUD, visit unshamenc.org.