I am a 42-year-old single mother of 4. I have been in recovery since October 15, 2004. My last day using I was cold, homeless and helpless and all I wanted was one more. As I sat in front of the shelter, a man who I knew by face, not by name, came outside and handed me a cordless phone with a detox facility on the other end with an available detox bed for me. I took that bed with little intention of stopping the madness. I just didn't want to be sick anymore. Since that day I have not found it necessary to put a drink or a drug in my body.
I had spent most of my life using and hating who I was and how I felt inside. Using made that all go away, or so I pretended. So I used for over 10 years. In those 10 years, I robbed myself of anything good, of any opportunities to get better. In those darks years, I had a son in active addiction. The love I had for him could not save me. A gift from God on that day in October was what saved me. My journey has been beautiful and ugly at the same time. It has been self-revealing, self-obsessive, selfless, emotional, scary, painful and rewarding. Getting clean was easy. Learning and accepting a new way of life has been an adventure I wouldn't change for all the money in the world. With almost 15 years in recovery now, I am now a mother of 4, an active member in a 12 step program and a recovery coach for an amazing facility in the city I live in, which is also the city I used in and got clean in..
Its not where you were, where you went or where you are. It is in who you become!
I am one of the many blessed to have found recovery. But there are still too many beautiful hopeless helpless lost souls still in the horrors of active addiction. So I ask you be kind, be gentle, be patient and show love always. Pray that they find the gift of freedom. No addict need die of active addiction. We Do Recover!