I lost my dad to it & I nearly lost my own life.
Please ask for help
From the very beginning I was a heavy drinker and I'm talking about at the age of 15. It was mostly for popularity and to hang with the "cool crowd" but after my dad died when I was 17 1/2 and a senior in high school it certainly got kicked up a notch. I fortunately got through college with decent grades and managed to receive a business degree and 1/2 of an MBA. My drinking would continue as I had a few jobs and then I finally found my dream job, a stockbroker. I had immediate success and quickly discovered cocaine, again choosing the wrong group of people to associate with. This is when my drinking really picked up and the disappearance of my money and former golfing associates also began. What I didn't realize was that I was feeding my ego and at the same time covering up a lot of unlocked trauma and pain. I would eventually lose almost everything not long after the birth of my first and only child, a son was born and I would also have a near fatal car accident while under the influence. I forgot to mention that I left my first rehab against medical advice a week earlier after having a run-in with the law that got swept under the rug. I nearly died in my second accident in as many weeks and ended up losing every ounce of blood from my body, completely shattering one leg, and getting ripped apart. Again no arrest , or surrender. After another shot at drinking and self medicating my wife said it was rehab, or she was leaving. I chose rehab. Thank God I did and after six and 1/2 years I am still alcohol and drug free. I started with a lot of AA meetings for 3 years and now I mostly use yoga, meditation and a ton of physical exercise to settle into my thoughts. I do my best to lead a life of intention rather than a life of reaction. I have surrendered and I am extremely grateful to get a second chance.