Surrender to love

By
Rebecca Da Silva
Tell us about your (or your loved one's) recovery journey. What has been the most rewarding part?

I lost endless hours, days, months years of time with those I love the most. I lost peace of mind and good health. Addiction left no area of my life untouched. It affected every part of who I am, negatively, as a wife, mother, daughter, sister, employee and the list goes. My addiction and drug of choice, may have given me temporary relief but in turn provided an everyday living hell. Addiction has touched my life on a vast scale, though I can say- I now know it doesn’t define me!

Do you have a message for the Shatterproof community?

Reach out! There are so many resources to help you become sober and live on in your sobriety. I could not believe how many open ears and arms I found, from professionals, friends, and family alike. I suffered in silence for a long time until it just became obvious to all around me. I wish I had found the will and courage sooner to address this illness much earlier on. Fight for your life!

I have lived and survived a fifteen year battle with prescription opioids, that monthly left me short and lead me to the streets. For as long as I remember I had a void that I ached to fill. Never knowing who I truly was, forever sick with a deep spiritual malady. I met my husband during my substance misuse. I managed to carry two beautiful, healthy children sober, those were my only two periods of sobriety during my 8-year marriage. My husband never had to endure the struggle of addiction, at least as an individual. Although his struggle, enormous pain, and despair, he was forced to experience with me, was great. He never gave up. Not once. After two rehab stints, I finally fairly recently “got it”. I was able to see the love, life and beautiful family I had was beyond worth it. I learned to surrender to the pain wounds early in life left me with. I learned scars truly do run deep, but you cannot continuously run from them. I learned faith and a higher power is key. I learned to make amends with myself and others. I learned to surrender to love! What a life that has been waiting for me this whole time!