Macauly was the youngest of four brothers. He started his struggle with addiction at 16 because one of his friends said "heroin is no big deal". Drugs have a way of capturing those who suffer inadequacies, low self-esteem and social anxiety brought on by trauma, however subtle, in school and at home. Macauly was the most loving baby and child until around grade school when he started being depressed and angry. He just wanted to be accepted for himself, fit in and have classmates and friends like him. He was put in therapy and we focused on his happiness but nothing seemed to work for him. Macauly was smart, creative, musical, stubborn, quiet with a sharp wit. He loved non-fiction books, documentaries, video games, and animals, especially his cat, Rajah Cheesesteak. He amazed us with his math skills and solving a Rubik's Cube faster than anyone, and his ability to play piano and guitar without lessons or reading music. He loved music. It was his life. From oldies to hip hop, especially hip hop. He created beats and rap music. He DJ'd professionally and for his mother in her car on road trips. He knew a lot and a little about everything. Religion, US and world politics, geography, history, nature, current events. He wanted to be a math teacher, an accountant, or work in the music industry. He would have made a difference. Although socially awkward around a lot of strangers, Mack was funny and fun around family and friends. He had a great smile and laugh. He loved his friends and family and would do anything for anyone. He had great empathy for everyone; mostly because he knew what it was like to be down and misunderstood. He struggled with addiction, but really his whole family struggled with him. He knew we all loved him. We were always there for him. It was not enough. Macauly wanted to be reincarnated as a praying mantis. The night we got the call that he died, we were out of the country in Grenada. While trying to sleep, a praying mantis landed on my hand and kept coming at me until I had to jump out of bed to get away. For his first birthday without him, eight of our family members went together and got praying mantis tattoos in his memory. The world is calmer but dimmer without him.