Create a Memorial

Michael Cavanaugh

Age 36
Father, Charismatic, Brother, Protector, Friend
Michael  Cavanaugh
Age 36
36

Michael was the life of the party! Always had a joke to crack, a helping hand to lend, and a protective soul like no other! If he wasn’t on the farm working with animals, which Mike had done his whole life, you could find him at the local country bar rocking the dance floor! My brother was my first dance partner. Michael sparked my love for line dancing. I will forever remember him as my best dance partner! This was a time of love, laughter, and happiness. There was no darkness we all know too well, addiction. Once Michael became addicted, he lived two lives. One full of darkness and one full of light. Michael protected his family and friends from that dark side for as long as he could. Even if it meant pushing others away. As my father said at his funeral, it wasn’t because he didn’t love you... it’s because he loved you so much! So much that he wanted to protect everyone from the dark side. During his time as a sober, free soul, you could find him educating the local addiction support group. Bringing loved ones together! Explaining to so many a side that so many will never see. Mike brought understanding and education! He always said “If there was a pill to make people feel what t feels like to go through withdrawal there would be no stigma!” I am here to continue to allow Michael to live on! To end the stigma! May he look down on all of these people fighting the same fight and be proud. Michael will forever be missed by family and friends!!!!

Introduction

Michael was the face who lit up the room! Charismatic, loving, hysterical, and kind. Michael is greatly missed by all!

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Buddy Vaughn

Age 33
Best friend, loving, caring, strong, beautiful soul
Buddy Vaughn
Age 33
33

Buddy was an amazing person. He had a heart of gold and genuinely cared about everyone he knew. He was a great father, loving son, and an incredible best friend. He would give his shirt off his back to anyone who needed it. Buddy loved music and always spoke of his family and how much they meant to him. Buddy was extremely intelligent and funny. He was resilient in his battle with addiction. Buddy was my best friend and not a day goes by that I don't think of him.

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Judson J. Harris

Age 35
Intelligent, compassionate, artistic, funny, musician
Judson Harris
Age 35
35

This is the eulogy I gave for my son one week ago:

Judson was my first child. I don’t know how to sum up his life in 10 minutes but I will do the best I can. He was born in 1983. He was a sweet child with huge blue eyes and blond hair. He was always quiet and inquisitive. 
He enjoyed being a big brother to his sister Lilly.

As a family we did a lot of things together. We took trips to upstate New York to Lake Champlain and stayed with Uncle Jesse and Aunt Vera. We took trips to the Outer Banks with his grandmother, Ganna, and his Aunt Lina and cousins Isabel Emma and Paul.

He was involved in all sorts of activities: Art classes, summer camps, karate, basketball, swimming lessons.

One of my favorite memories was reading him bedtime stories every night when he was very young.That is how his love of books began. His very favorite was " Where the wild things are" by Maurice Sendack. I believe that a lot of his artwork was inspired by that book.

He shared a love of animals with his sister and stepfather Ed. There was a never ending parade of dogs, cats, Guinea pigs, hamsters, and fish in our house.

He became a musician from an early age. He was in several bands. A lot of his former band mates are here today. I got to see him perform in public a few times and I was so proud of him.

Judson was the most misunderstood person I have ever known. He looked tough with the tattoos and piercings and he often didn't show much expression. But that was because he didn't want the world to see how sensitive he was. He loved his family. He loved his friends and his pets. Sal was his favorite dog in the world and his best friend.

Yet, he was very strong as well. He refused to alter anything about himself to please those who demanded conformity. In his younger years that often got him in trouble because many authority figures felt threatened by the way he looked and the fact that he didn’t care that it bothered them. He was never afraid to stare down hypocrisy. Even if it meant that he would be punished for it. He didn’t flinch. He was going to be Judson no matter what. I respect him for that. 

He went about his life peacefully, with a quiet dignity. He had a fierce intellect that many were in awe of. He had a sharp and quick wit that few could match. He was funny. He would come up with hilarious one liners. He could have an intelligent and informed conversation on just about any topic. He was very well read and self-educated. He hated ignorance, intolerance,injustice, and hypocrisy. He did not suffer fools.

He was very private and only a few people really knew him well. Yet, he was loved and adored by many. I joke that for being such a self-professed introvert, he sure had a lot of friends.

In his more recent years, he started doing the wonderful art that we have on display today. He always loved monsters. He loved dressing up in costumes for Halloween. One of his best costumes was when his aunt Linda helped him dress up as Dracula. So in much of his art the theme is monsters. I’m so glad we have his art and music to remember him by.

Judson had a problem with drug addiction. He struggled with it for many years--too many. And he hated it. He wanted so badly to put it behind him. He really tried.
He lived a good life in spite of it. His spirit and mind thrived in spite of it. His creativity flourished in spite of it.
The drug addiction was a disease that he fought for a long time and he ultimately lost that fight. But it did not define him. He was so much more. It doesn’t mean he was weak. He was anything but weak. It was not a character flaw. Judson had an excellent character. It was not a moral issue. Judson had very strong morals.

It’s time to stop treating drug addiction like a dirty little secret. Many families affected by addiction remain silent out of shame. But there is nothing to be ashamed of. It does not reflect on the parents and families of those who struggle with addiction. It can happen in ANY family. It does not discriminate. Talking about it and becoming educated about it will go a long way towards helping to eradicate it.

I’m going to read a poem Judson wrote about his struggle with addiction that I found when going through his things just a few days ago.

You could call me a pugilist
I’m a self destructive prize fighter
Going round for round and blow for blow
Solo.
But I only fight in the dark.
And I’ve only ever lost.
This is a knock down drag out twelve round dog fight
And I’m going home with the belt if I lose.
My record is abysmal
Because my opponent is miserable
And this fight will never end until one of us dies.
Who will be the lucky loser

In Judson’s honor, please remember him well. Plant a flower in your garden for him. When you behold the breathtaking beauty of nature think of him. When you're at the ocean listening to the sound of the waves crashing think of him. When you are celebrating something significant in your life like your wedding, raise your glass in his honor. When you look up in the night sky and see a million twinkling stars think of Judson. He was an extraordinary man and I want him to be remembered for all of the wonderful things that made him uniquely Judson. And he was very unique.

I love you Judson. I’ll see you on on the other side. May you rest in peace and be surrounded by angels. I’ll never stop missing you. None of us will.

Introduction

My son died on October 15, 2018 at age 35. He had struggled with heroin addiction for almost 20 years and I thought he was finished doing the hard stuff.
He was a good man. He hated that heroin had control over him. He was a musician and artist and truth seeker and poet.
The last time I saw him was on his 35th birthday.

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Jamie Ann cynthia De Sousa Dias

Age 0
Mother, wife, and bestest friend
Jamie De Sousa Dias
Age 0
0

Jamie was a beloved mother, wife, sister, and best friend. She passed away at 32. Her struggle with addiction didn't manifest until her adult years. She graduated high school, then became a nurse at a corrections facility. Jamie went into recovery and decided to become a drug and alcohol counselor while attending school. She had a relapse on alcohol, passed out behind the wheel of her vehicle, and she went to the ICU where she remained for 3 weeks. She broke her back and was then prescribed heavy amounts of OxyContin while still attending school and trying to fight her fight with addiction. It had been time to pull her off the prescription pain pills after multiple detox stays and endless days of withdrawal. Her story is like so many others. She turned to heroin. Jamie had been in treatment and 30 days sober before her last relapse. She picked up where she left off and died on October 30, 2018 of a heroin overdose. She was set to graduate the week that she passed away. Jamie's struggle is over but her story has not ended.

Introduction

“you're my person"
Now and forever
Never Forgotten
Jamie Ann Cynthia De Sousa Dias

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Travis Sebastian Fettig

Age 20
Son, Brother, Kind, Loving
Travis Fettig
Age 20
20

Travis was a kind and caring person who always put others ahead of himself. We have had many parents tell us that Travis helped their kids in high school. He stopped many bullies from affecting his friends. His issues started after his freshman year of high school. He was a great wrestler as a freshman. He had emergency surgery on his leg in the summer after this year. He had "compartment syndrome" and was 30 minutes away from losing his leg. He was on a morphine pump for a week in the hospital. This was when his addiction started. His best friend then died in an ATV accident five months later. He went from pain pills to self-medicating with marijuana. He then had his wisdom teeth removed. More pain pills. We believe his heroin addiction started when the pain pill prescription ended. He was functioning while suffering from addiction. Working hard as an assistant manager and driver for Papa John's pizza. He was arrested on Thanksgiving morning of 2016 on his way home from work. He admitted his dependence to us. We luckily found a rehab center that had one opening. That Saturday we checked him in for a 30 day stay. He was released on December 27th of 2016. His counselors were enthusiastic about Travis's time there. They thought he had a great chance to make it. He immediately went from rehab to sober living. He was put on 5-day probation 7 days later because he drank a beer during a football game. We welcomed him home for the 5 days. He immediately made arrangement to be readmitted to the sober living house. His first day home was a great day. The old Travis was back. We had great conversations with him. He had to go to a meeting every night for his sober house reentry. He was going to them. The next day was okay but we could tell there was a change with him. The third day was a little worse. We could tell something was wrong. He would not talk about it. We found him passed on his bedroom floor the next morning. He is greatly missed. I miss all the things that a parent looks forward to with a child.

Introduction

Travis passed away from an accidental heroin overdose on January 6, 2017. He will be greatly missed by all who knew him.

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Nathan Solomon Miller

Age 26
Genuine, fun, unique, hilarious, loyal
Nathan  Miller
Age 26
26

Nate was one of the most genuine people you will ever meet. He was always so much fun and the life of the party. He was good to his friends and was very smart. You always knew when you saw Nate you were going to have a good time. He should have done stand up comedy. You could talk to him about anything and knew you could trust him. He had many friends that truly miss him and whose lives changed forever after knowing him.

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Bryce Kristopher Tjaden

Age 30
Son, Brother, Loving, Ambitious, Caring
Bryce Tjaden
Age 30
30

Bryce was always a very active and happy child. He started walking at 10 months and never slowed down. He loved motor cross, bicycles, snowboarding, jet skiing, high dives, anything daring. He loved his family and friends and would do anything for them. He loved animals and would often bring home strays to take care of. His laughter was contagious and he had beautiful blue eyes. He became an iron worker hanging steel primarily in the Bay Area, CA, working on sky scrappers. He loved his job, which is not surprising since it takes a lot of courage to hang from buildings hundreds of feet in the air. His problem with substance use started in his mid-20s and started with Oxycontin, which led to heroine addiction. He had tried to quit several times, sometimes for months, sometimes for a year at a time, but he just couldn't seem to concur this horrible affliction as much as he wanted to. He eventually developed a heart infection from using needles, which ultimately led to a blood clot that traveled to his brain causing a stroke and then a second stroke. Living in this world without him is unimaginable, he truly was so amazing and so loved by so many people. All I can hope for now is that his story might help even one other person or parent not have to go through this pain. The end of his life was filled with a lot of pain and suffering, which breaks our hearts, but his life was so full and beautiful for the majority of his years in this world. We just wish this had never happened and that he could have had so many more years with us, without pain.

Introduction

Bryce was so full of life, always looking for the next adventure. He loved snowboarding, motor cross, jet skiing, bicycling, anything that required him to be a daredevil. He loved being active, he loved his job, his family and his friends and would do anything for them. He also loved animals and often brought home strays to be cared for and loved. His laughter was contagious and his light leaving this world is just so difficult to accept.

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Bailey Scott Stanhope

Age 20
Hilarious, beautiful, adored, amazing, ferocious
Bailey  Stanhope
Age 20
20

Bailey had the biggest personality I had ever met. His smile would light up a room like you wouldn’t believe. Bailey didn’t deserve this. We did everything we possibly could to prevent this outcome, one we feared for many years. Help was somewhat there, but it was half-assed; more drugs were attainable in rehabs than at home. MY SON DIED. I want revenge and so much more! I want to change the face of addiction and rise up! I refuse to let my son be just a statistic. I will do whatever it takes to show the world how devastating this disease truly is.

Introduction

I lost my son on July 4, 2018. I am here to make a difference.

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Jenny Lynne Patszalek (O'Connor

Age 45
Mom, smart, fun, alone
Jenny Patszalek (O'Connor
Age 45
45
Introduction

I lost my sister Jenny last year to prescription opioids. She was a college-educated, middle class suburban mom. I experienced the entirety of her addiction, struggle, and death in just six days last July. https://www.bustle.com/p/i-didnt-understand-the-opioid-crisis-until-it-…

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James Dean Ropp

Age 19
Energetic, intuitive, personable, creative, smart
James Ropp
Age 19
19

I struggled with addiction in my family most of my life. This was no different for my son. I have been in recovery for 20 years and built a solid foundation for myself and my two kids. My drive was to get ahead of this disease and give my kids a life I didn't have. I knew early on that James was struggling with something more serious. We were in and out of counseling, support groups, rehabs, IOP's, APG' s, recovery for teens and families, recovery groups but nobody won. We all lost because there is no such thing as getting ahead of this disease. We miss him terribly. He had an infectious smile with an individual and unique personality. He loved to dress nicely and was so personable. He was a creative person with an intuitive nature about him. He enjoyed people and interacting with them. We miss everything about him. He left far too soon...but then again any child passing is too soon.

Introduction

James Dean Ropp was a vibrant 19 year old. He passed on 10-13-18 due to a drug overdose. His passing was far too soon and we miss him terribly. He was so loved!

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Samuel Brice Drennan

Age 29
funny outrageous son friend brother
Samuel Drennan
Age 29
29

For wonderful funny stories and images, see facebook, instagram etc.

Here I will share Sam's long fight with mental illness and addiction, hoping that someone might relate and get help or help someone else.

Sam was diagnosed with ADHD in 4th grade. He took a wide variety of pills that worked for a while then didn't. He hated taking them - no appetite, felt depressed, etc. Once when I cleaned his room I found hundreds of pills stuck to the inside of his bed frame. He had a counselor at this time, Rick I think - great guy, but Sam said to me, "Nothing will change me."

He began misusing drugs and alcohol in high school (selling too). His grades were terrible, he cut classes. We thought that not allowing him to get his drivers license would be a good incentive but he just got rides from others. When I sent him to his room without phones, videos, TV, he just kicked the walls endlessly to let us know nothing would make a difference. When he turned 18, we told him he had to leave. He did not graduate from his high school. Aunt Nancy took him in for a while and he graduated from the one in her town.

Fast forward to his first real drug treatment. Drug of choice: Xanax. His friend Alex found Sam's biological father who was a psychiatrist at an addiction facility. He brought him there (Connecticut). He was given additional diagnoses: Bipolar and Narcissistic Personality Disorder. He completed the 30 days, then went to step down in  California. He started to rebel and things went south.

Years later, in Charleston, he OD'd a few times, the worst about a year ago - needed Narcan, came very close to dying. A couple of weeks later he agreed to an inpatient program for 8 days. He came home with us and went to AA meetings every day. He'd been prescribed Latuda, which was great, but I think he started cutting back on the dose along the way. Savior Alex popped up again inviting him to Phoenix. He did better these last 10 months than ever before - worked in  restaurants, was never late! He got in a motorcycle accident a few weeks ago, required hand surgery and of course had some narcotics. To what extent this led to his death, I don't know, but I've read countless stories like this over the last couple of years with tens of thousand of people dying of this insane addiction. And it could have been other things but it doesn't matter. He's gone. Please whoever's out there stop this madness.

Introduction

All I can hope is that Sam's story will save at least one person. You are all so precious to those who love you. Please stay with us and find beauty and hope around you.

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Shelby Nicole Hensley

Age 24
Daughter, Sister, Artistic, Caring, Loved Nature
Shelby Hensley
Age 24
24

My beautiful daughter, Shelby, loved to read and write her entire life. She loved nature, especially butterflies. She would collect insects and take photos of them and even put together a notebook of the insects she had found. Throughout childhood, Shelby would read in her bed with a flashlight late into the night. She even earned an award in elementary school for being the "Most Behaved Student". Shelby had a huge heart and would often spend hours listening to friends who were struggling or hurting. Shelby's senior year she experienced several painful things that sent her deep into depression. Shelby attempted suicide that year and after a long night at the ER, she was moved to a youth suicide facility. Shelby was prescribed medications for depression and anxiety and eventually medications for sleep. She was in a toxic, abusive relationship for years after high school and she eventually turned to heroin to help numb her pain. She struggled with many past hurts but always stayed close to me and wanted a better life. Last October, Shelby knew she had hit the bottom and asked me to help her. I took her to a 25 day treatment program where she excelled and found herself again. Her counselor told me that she was a leader and was very focused on her sobriety and helping others. She asked to continue treatment at a sober living home for women in Soledad California where she continued to excel and become very excited about her future. She wanted to become an addiction counselor. After 3 months, she was homesick and asked to come home. She was enjoying her new life and had just gotten a job. She did her taxes and was so happy she would have enough to pay off all legal debts and fines. She celebrated 5 months sober and was enjoying being home and away from the toxic relationship and drugs. On March 7, she had a probation meeting that went so well she texted me during the meeting to tell me she was so excited and would call as soon as it ended. She called me and sounded so positive and excited. She was doing it, and they told her she was doing well and would be able to waive a lot because of her treatment reports and sobriety. She sounded so happy when she called me at 4:07pm and told me she was on her way home and she loved me and would see me at dinner. That would be her last phone call or communication with anyone. She had told a friend that she was being pulled by heroin that morning since she was near her old area. She apparently got some and used it right after our call. Minutes after we hung up, she pulled off the interstate and crawled in the back seat and died immediately. It was pure fentanyl. She and I were so close, and it destroyed me. I am a runner and have dedicated every mile I run to honor her and raise awareness to help other families dealing with addiction. I just raised over $1,000.00 for the Shatterproof 5K Atlanta and I run every race in tie dye now because of her love for tie dye. When people ask about my tie dye, it gives me a platform to share her story and honor her memory.

Introduction

My beautiful daughter, Shelby, died on March 9, 2018 from a lethal level of fentanyl. Shelby was artistic and loved to read and write. She loved butterflies her whole life and even asked me to buy a habitat when she was little so she could watch all stages of life. We did this and it was beautiful. Shelby was open with me about her addiction and came to me for help at her lowest point. She was so excited to finish a 35 day program then advance to a sober living home for women. She excelled there and overcame a lot of past hurts. She loved her new sober life and wanted to become an addiction counselor to help others escape the chains that held her so tightly. Her first relapse was her only relapse after completing the program. She did not get a second chance. I miss our deep, long talks about everything. I miss that for 24 years she told me goodnight and she loved me no matter where she was. I miss her love for the outdoors and nature and going on hikes and camping trips. Shelby loved being with family. I miss her so much every single day.

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Anthony Ackley

Age 20
Gentle, funny, loving, son
Anthony Ackley
Age 20
20

My son and I met Anthony on the first day of school in first grade. They were both new to the school and each came home saying they have a new best friend.

The boys stayed close and though some interests and activities changed, our small community of Laguna Beach kept everyone in the loop. Anthony tragically lost his mom in 1999 and a little light diminished in him that could not be rekindled. 

Anthony's substance use history is not clear to any of us, but we all knew he wanted to turn that light back on and for but a moment he may have felt like it was. 

We saw and spent time with this amazing red haired angel boy prior to his passing...he seemed sad. While he only spent 21 years here on earth, his light is on in heaven with his mama! We all love you boy!

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Abigail H Kadar

Age 28
Mother, daughter, friend, beautiful, happy
Abigail Kadar
Age 28
28

Abbs was one of the best people I ever met. She was always there when you needed her. She loved to help people. She loved her kids and always wanted to be the best mom she could be. But unfortunately her addiction put limitations on the life she lived and drastically shortened her life. She died from an overdose not long after returning from a rehab in Florida. She was 28 years old.

Introduction

Abby was a loving mom, great friend, and an all around great person. Always trying to help everyone and happy doing it. She was definitely one of a kind.

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Michael Millard

Age 27
Loyal, son, friend, smart, funny
Michael  Millard
Age 27
27

Mike was the friend everyone wanted to have and to be.

My son Dylan, his best friend Noah, and Mike were college roommates in San Francisco. The first time I met Mike, his smile lit up the room. He was warm and friendly, not in the polite "be nice to parents" way, but genuine and authentic.

He cared about the world around him and made an impact in his short life.
A brilliant young man lost far too soon! He's still making an impact from above! XO

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Jack Key Armstrong

Age 20
Shining star, loving and brilliant!
Jack  Armstrong
Age 20
20

Jack was very intelligent, kind and a peace maker. He was an outstanding basketball player and a straight A student his entire life. He had goals and dreams of becoming an anesthesiologist and was well on his way to achieving just that. He took one pill that was poisoned with fentynal and died way too soon. He touched many lives over the years and is greatly missed by many many people. I speak his name daily and never stop thinking about him, never ever. I miss him so much it hurts. Singing with the angels and hanging out with his Dad, Jack will never be forgotten.

Introduction

My son, my pet, my shining star! This young man had the qualities of a leader and a champ. He touched lives and helped others with ease. He was gifted on so many levels. Unforgettable!!

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Justin Curtis Miller

Age 23
Father, son, brother, beautiful soul, loved
Justin  Miller
Age 23
23

Justin was one of the most loving and kind people you could know. He started out using pain pills and marijuana when he was a teenager, He was a very shy person that had a lot of trouble meeting and talking to people. Eventually he met and fell in love with a girl named Rachel who is the mother of his children. He got a job roofing and they had a place. Then they both started with the heroin, and the addiction took over both of them. They moved back here and eventually she left. Justin was heartbroken. The children are with my nephew and his wife as they are in the process of adopting them. Justin was really shattered after he lost his babies. He was trying so hard to get it together and get sober for his children as well as himself but it just didn't happen. Justin was always willing to help anyone in need and would give you the shirt off of his back. My son was loved by everyone that knew him and he is missed by all. His son will never know his father and what a great guy he was. I thank God his daughter had almost 5 years with him before he passed away. His kids were his world and he loved them both with every fiber of his being. I want people to know that Justin was loved so much by all of us and we miss him every minute of every day. He wasn't a nobody; my boy was a somebody. If his story can save one life then his death will not be in vain. Justin was an organ donor and he did save other's lives by being a donor. Even though he was in a dark place he loved life and he loved his family with all of his heart. My son was one of my best friends and it shattered my heart to lose him. My life is forever changed. Justin touched a lot of hearts and he had a beautiful soul. I just want everyone that is lost to those demons called addiction to please seek help and don't be afraid. You can do this; you are a somebody and you are worth saving. Please don't have your loved one putting your last picture on this page telling your story like myself and so many others have had to do. Justin, I love you with all my heart and I always will. I hope you have found peace and you are flying high above with the angels. I will never forget you son and all of the joy you brought to my life and so many others. I miss you every day.

Introduction

My beloved son Justin lost his battle with his demons. He wanted nothing more than to be sober and free. My boy fought that battle so hard and struggled. He left behind two beautiful children and a family that truly loved him. My heart is shattered and my baby is forever 23. It is still so hard to believe that he is never coming home.

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Tracey Juarez

Age 49
Mother, Sister, Daughter, Selfless
Tracey Juarez
Age 49
49

My mother was a strong woman. She battled with addiction for many years but was the most selfless person ever. She was a mother of three and she had three sisters, two grandchildren, and help create a church. She tried to help others who struggled with addiction but unfortunately couldn’t kick her own. I miss her voice. I miss her laugh and this will be the first birthday I will not hear her.

Introduction

My mother helped create a church and help those who struggled with addiction. She battled her own addiction and lost that battle leaving behind a son, two daughters, parents, sisters, and a husband.

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Zackariah Wescott Williamson

Age 22
Incredible father, intelligent
Zackariah Williamson
Age 22
22

Zackariah was only 22 when he lost his battle with his addiction. Our son will never get the chance to know that amazing man his father could have been. He gave our son his green eyes and his intelligence. We had a rocky relationship but my heart is filled with nothing but love for the man that helped give life to the amazing little boy I call my son. We miss you every day.

Introduction

Zackariah was the father to our beautiful 4 year old son

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Jordan Dean Ciccone

Age 21
Son, nephew, lover of nature
Jordan Ciccone
Age 21
21

Jordan was one of the happiest little boys you’d ever meet from the minute he surprised us and decided he wanted to be born on halloween day. He was a lover of all things in nature and was happiest at the turtle pond or catching frogs. His struggle began in his teenage years, but his love for his family, his mom in particular, never faltered, not even for a second. He showed up for family ALWAYS putting all of his personal struggles aside, even spending his last night on this earth helping his mom celebrate her anniversary. The last text he sent her was “be careful driving tonight mom the roads are bad” always thinking of others!!! He is missed more than words could ever describe and we are left with shattered hearts trying to pick up the pieces and figure out how to go on.

Introduction

My nephew Jordan struggled with addiction for most of his teenage years. Lost his battle this past August 2018.

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