The National Addiction Memorial honors the loved ones we’ve lost.

Alex was very smart. He liked to feel comfortable and secure. Alex started smoking pot and drinking before he was 16. I didn’t know about this until he got in trouble at school. He went to counseling and stayed clean till graduation. They random drug tested. After graduation, he went off to Western Carolina, where he knew no one. I think that was a big mistake on our part. But we didn’t know that he was going to end up using Xanax to feel comfortable in his own skin.

He flunked out of Western and returned home and lived with his Dad. He got a full time job at Walmart. He and his Dad had issues, so he came to live with me and my husband. The first of March, 2017, I found him passed out in his room. We decided to send him to 30 days of treatment. Two months later he was dead. A mixture of Xanax and a small amount of fentanyl. The fentanyl is what killed him. My life has been a day to day struggle. I miss him terribly. The loss is like someone took a hard ball and pierced it through my heart. It is the worst thing in the world to lose your child. Janice

Colin loved sports from the time he was younger. He was the most loving, caring person ever. He made everyone around him feel happy and comfortable. Colin actively played softball and had a dream of playing in the major leagues one day. Sadly, Colin was sober and used one night, which took his life because of a bad batch. He will be missed forever by everyone whose life he touched.

Jacob was an intelligent, kind-hearted, and loving person. He loved his little sister and little brother. Jacob taught his sister how to play basketball, a sport they both loved. He didn't have time to teach his brother the same skills but showered him with love any chance he got. A bright soul that lost his way in the world. So many people loved him. We all wish for another day. Another hour. Five minutes to attempt to say all that was neglected to be said. We will miss you for a lifetime and love you for eternity.

We lost our loving father, husband, son, brother, uncle, and friend August 19, 2016. The world feels so empty without his wit, charm, smile, and one liners. A piece of each of us has been missing since he left the world that Friday evening at 8:19 PM.

Mark Smith was the most generous man you could meet. He would give the last $20 to his name or shirt off his back to help a family member or friend. His hugs would take away any worry you had in the world. He loved to make people laugh. And his smile would light up a room. My dad was a person you would meet and would never forget. They say time heals, but all it does is make us miss him more. As he would always say to my mom, sister, and I, “You will always be in my heart”.

Our family would like to join the others out there that are dealing with the heartache that we face every day. The disease of addiction does not discriminate, it could happen to any of us. Let’s fight for better treatment and bring this disease to light. Let’s break the stigma and change the conversation about addiction.

My brother made everyone around him smile. When he loved, he loved with all his heart. He was definitely a lover, not a fighter. His daughters were his world. Even though he struggled, he was an amazing father who was always playing legos with his girls or with his nephews. He was an amazing uncle also. When he was locked up, so many people said Eugene made jail/prison bearable because he made the best of everything. He was a hard worker, and he was a member of the millwright union along with my dad He loved to spend the summer out at the lake swimming and just spending time with friends and family. He took a piece of all of us to heaven with him that day, and our family will never be the same. He is the reason I am in recovery today. My angel.

My sweet Melissa was gifted... She learned to play the keyboard by ear and her voice was so sweet to hear as she sang. She loved numbers. Graduated as an accountant. Loved crafts and drawing, and playing board games and card games, and she was very competitive. She was not her addiction; she was and still is my beautiful sweet second born whom I love❣

Our beloved Dawn unexpectedly passed away on March 2, 2018, at the age of 43. She was as beautiful on the inside, as she was out. She had a caring heart, and would light up the room with her amazing smile. She had a long struggle with alcoholism and on that day, while it was accidental, she lost the battle. She was a larger than life force, who lives within us all, and her presence will forever be with us.

Matt was an amazing person, always making people laugh. He loved cooking and playing games. He also loved heroin. I'd never met someone so loving in all my life. He was smart and knew a lot about the universe. He died four days before our wedding. He told me he wanted to be a grandpa so he could tell his grandkids to stop playing in the grass. I miss him so much and not a day goes by I don't think of him.

Travis battled years of addiction, depression, and anxiety. We did everything possible to help him fight his demons. Travis moved to North Carolina to be closer to our older son a few years ago. He was doing well, had a job, girlfriends, and heart of gold.
Then came the dreaded call last September. We are heartbroken as we miss him every day. He will always be in our hearts.
forever25travis

We lost our dear grandchild, Alexis Shapiro, to an overdose on August 11, 2018. She was 20 years young. She suffered with this terrible disease for many years and was in residential treatment centers three times. She also went to day care centers several times as follow ups to her residential treatments. She was clean for four weeks and set to go into an halfway house the day after she overdosed.
She started college but could not get past the first year. The insecurities she felt lead her to lean on opioids and drugs. Unfortunately, in the last few years she never felt adequate, happy, or secure unless she was on drugs.
Our family goal is to prevent even one family from going through this devastating event. We are united with SHATTERPROOF to reach this lofty goal.

My son was a beautiful baby, and he was my first born, my first true love. I miss him beyond words. I feel like part of who I am now is a grieving mother. It has been five years since he died and I was told that time cures everything. Well, if you have lost a child for any reason, you know that the one thing that time does not cure is the lose of a child. I parented Sheldon till he was 3 and then gave him to his paternal grandparents to take care of.This was to be temporary. I was a young mother. I was struggling with addiction and needed to go get clean. So I headed off to My home town without my son. I stayed sober for going on 26 years now. Sheldon grew up with his grandparents. Unfortunately, by the time I was ready to be a parent to him he had already made a life in California with his grandparents.
At 12 years old, Sheldon was showing signs of genius level computer skills. He enrolled in the local community college to take computer programming classes to make games on the computer. Sheldon was so loving, and smart. He was also very creative. He loved writing music, singing,magic. He was a boy Scout and a black belt in taekwando. Anything he tried he would become the best he could. I was not parenting Sheldon but I was seeing Sheldon about 3 to 4 times a year. The first few months back home I found out I was pregnant with a little girl. This gave sheldon a sister whom he adored. At 12, Sheldon convinced his grandparents to let him have a cosmetic surgery that would make him feel better about being overweight.This was the beginning of the addiction to opiates for Sheldon.I knew that myself being a recovering addict and sheldons dad being an addict definitely predispositioned genetically for my son and daughter to be addicts. I really did not understand what that meant. I do now.
Sheldon was also diagnosed with A.D.D. , when he was in 3rd grade. He figured out that he could trade one prescription for another. I Jump ahead about five years and my beautiful son,my first true love had acquired a love for drawing, a love for people, a love for writing and making music. He had a big secret though. He was now completly addicted to opiates and now was smoking pot and drinking.Sheldon was starting to lose himself to his addiction. As a mother living far away it was hard for me to keep him talking and communicating with me. He was a teenager and He was all about his friends, who did not know his secret. I would talk to my son about once a week and try to dig and pry about his life. He would tell me not to worry that hes walking the line being a good person. I worried so much. The last time I saw Sheldon was when he was 17 and he came to visit me and his sister for a week. I will never forget that week I had with him. I knew he was using something but I did not want to bring it up or upset him and possibly ruin his visit. My heart aches that I did not reach out to him. The next few years my son and I would talk but he became less and less engaged. His grandparents told me his grades were slipping and he was busted stealing money from them. Although when I talked to my son he never mentioned any of the problems he was having.Finally when he had dropped out of school lost all respect and trust he had from his grandparents, finally then I asked him what he was using. He was so mad at me. But I kept on. I would tell him that I love him but i don't like the addiction. I would try to seperate his behaviour from who he really was.He did tell me that he was angry with me for leaving him when he was three. He asked me how could I do that. I told him because I love him. I knew if I stayed in California that I would not ne any good for him. He was angry and nothing I said was going to make it right. I tried to reach out but he was shutting himself down. Me living in Colorado and Sheldon living in California the distance started to grow. At 21, Sheldon had moved from taking pills to shooting up heroin. This is how I lost my son my first true love. I will never forget that phone call. The phone call that would forever change my life. The phone call that completly left my heart space with sadness and turmoil and the deepest kind of hurt that I would want no one to feel. The phone call was sheldons grandmother telling me that my son had died during the night. That they found him in his room with a syringe sticking out of his arm. I vomited and then laid in the grass on my back. I had thrown my phone. As I laid there numb watching the clouds for about 5 minutes her voice echoing through my mind it took a minute for what she said to really hit my mind. When it did I started crying and I did not really stop for a year.
The night of June 25, 2013 my son gave himself his last dose and fell asleep and he never woke up. My beautiful, smart, amazing love, my son was gone. The guilt was overwhelming. I still struggle at times. But the sun rises every day and sets every night. I remember the first few days after I found out, I went to a mental hospital. One of the counselors asked me how I was feeling and I said I feel like someone chopped off one of my limbs. The counselor said without hesitation, "Even amputees learn to walk again. They never walk the same but they walk again." I am still sad. I wonder all the time what my beautiful boy was thinking in his last hour. I wonder what life would have been like for him if I would have demanded that he come live with me. I wonder if he ever forgave me. I wonder if he is in a better place. I hope that he knows how much I adore him. How I never judged him. I only ever wanted him to be happy. I hope wherever he is that he is at peace. Hug your children talk to your children even if it rocks the boat. Confront your children and teach your children.

When I met Justin he was 17 years old, and within minutes I knew we were meant to be together. He was so protective, loving, caring, and supportive. No matter what my dreams ever were, he supported me. Within time we had our own beautiful little family of two girls and one boy. Justin was an amazing, caring, hilarious father, who no matter what it took, ensured his children were safe, happy, loved, and cared for. No matter what the situation, Justin took care of anyone he could, regardless of how it could or would negatively affect him. We miss Justin every minute of every day; no matter how bad it got, or how rough our road was we were always there for each other. He was my rock, his children's rock, and many others. He stood behind to catch them when they fell. Justin will always be remembered every day for the amazing, loving, caring, supportive, and comical man he was.

As we approach the two year anniversary of losing Michael Anthony, we remember his warm hugs, his smile, his sensitive soul, and the love he gave to everyone around him. Michael was smart, funny, kind, and loving. He was a son, a brother, a cousin, a nephew, a grandson, a friend, and so much more. Michael left us on Thanksgiving Day, 2016, and a piece of all of us has been missing ever since.

We walk in Michael's honor and in honor of those friends and family members who struggle with addiction. We know that this disease is more powerful than all of us but we will continue to fight for better treatment and to bring this disease into the light. We want to change the conversation about addiction.

We love you so much, Michael Anthony. You are always in our hearts.

We will always keep the fire burning for you!

Losing my mom was the hardest point of my life. Continuing to raise my sister, work full time and go to college full time at 21 has not been easy, but she fought as hard and long as she could. We all miss her laugh, her broccoli cheddar cheese casserole, her terrible singing voice, but mostly her love. Emilee and I love you Mom.

Loved to be with his family and friends. Would help anyone who needed it in a heartbeat. Fought with addiction for many years and sadly lost the battle. Shawn was very loved and is highly missed by his loved ones. I miss my son.

The most painful part of loving someone with an addiction is watching them kill themselves. All we want is peace for our loved one.

"He’s so effing rock star. Oh, the whole vibe. He’s so brilliant. I can’t say was, Danny is too effervescent and present."

"Dan was a lively, brilliant, precocious, hilarious companion. My kids instantly and adoringly attached to him, and he and my oldest Ben became a comedy duo and partners in crime. He was always entertaining us, always thinking up innovative and zany ways to undertake the simplest of tasks. Super inventive, he provided witty storylines for the infamous Pig cartoon series (best described as Viz meets Freddy Krueger). Dan starred in the Danabelle Show, in which he was fluent when interviewed on a range of nonsensical topics. Playing Consequences each night camping in Maine, he had us screaming with laughter. I have really struggled to think of examples of any of this that are polite enough to share. But the tales of our time together grew bigger with each retelling — narrow escapes from Russian terrorist snorkelers, the boulder-throwing baby, the elderly landlady's curse."

"I miss his encyclopedic knowledge of every player in the Premier league and how he fully indulged my observations about players' hairstyles and tattoos. Together we would imagine what they were like off the pitch. Danny's imagination had that wonderful ability to take a yarn and run with it."

"Adventure Bus Danny — such a bright light! This is how I will always think of him."

"Whenever we walked around in public, he used to scream, 'I love my girlfriend!!!' at the top of his lungs. Everyone would always turn their head and I’d be laughing and blushing. Danny loved to be loud and his authentic spunky self. Whenever he’d sing along to London Calling by the Clash, he’d turn on his cute British accent and belt it out. We used to climb up to the rooftop and sing and dance to our songs. They were Suzanne by Leonard Cohen, Die for You by The Weeknd and Young and Beautiful by Lana del Rey. We slow danced, rocked out, played air guitar, and held hands as we’d sing 'I would dieeee for youuuuuuu' and 'Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful? I know youuuuu willlll.' "

"Those gorgeous blond curls and a wee boy who just couldn’t stop kissing his beloved mum. Giggling away. The joy between you both. An infinite connection. A spirit so large, and oh that grin."

"He was little — maybe in Martha’s Vineyard, 2001? And we went for pizza. We looked around and the pizza topping had all gone leaving only the base smeared with tomato. And Wubby with a look in his face as if to say 'what pizza?' He’d basically sucked it all up like a hoover."

"In theater class, the teacher gave Danny an extraordinary compliment, saying he reminded him of Robin Williams."

"I always adored Danny and have so many positive images of him… his bouncing a ball off my wall repeatedly, his cuddling next to you on the couch, his wit and infectious smile… all admidst his struggle to sort things out when he was a young teen. So so bright. So so deserving of a good life."

"I was always awestruck by the depth of our conversations and the maturity Danny demonstrated. I don’t think I’ve known a high school senior so devoted to and respectful of his girlfriend than Danny. It was such an honor to work with Danny and to have a relationship with him and witness his gifts first hand. He was a special, special guy and I’m so very sorry the world won’t have the chance to benefit from his very bright light."

"My most vivid memory of him was at a soccer game; you yelled from the sidelines that he needed to score a goal if he wanted dinner that night and he scored! I remember his bright face looking at you with victory. Oh he was so cute."

"Danny demonstrated a sense of humility that I so admired. Danny never understood bravado, showmanship and adolescent drama. I sometimes thought he was too special and unique for this place. Danny had a compassionate heart. He didn’t judge – and I think he often struggled with why the world around him wouldn’t simply apply this same way of thinking. He’d say, 'You know what I don’t get Mr. D…,' and I would listen and simply think, 'Yeah I hear ya, bud.' And that time spent with Danny and listening to his pearls often made me stop and shift my thinking. Danny had an impact on people – if you were listening."

"When I tried to put Danny in his pack-and-play to sleep he stood in his jammies saying, 'No thank you!' Over and over!! In his little English accent. It certainly worked on me. ❤️❤️"

"I remember him telling me all about reading Freakonomics when he was like 10-12? And I was totally blown away and had no idea what he was talking about."

"When you guys stayed with us in London, maybe about 6 or 7 years ago, he really bonded with Orla making pretend spears and knives in the garden from bits of wood and string. Also he explained the American school system to Orla and rounded off with, 'And then when you're 18 you go to university... or prison.' Always that wicked sense of humour."

"I loved it when he went hiking with us. Even though he had never been on the trails, he was so eager to see everything that he had to lead. His enthusiasm was contagious. Always a smile on his face, like he had just discovered a wonderful secret."

"From the first time we met Danny (a decade ago) we all fell in love with this bright, sparkling, wacky little guy. Whether hiking, running around on a field, or just hanging out eating pizza on our special Tuesday evenings, Danny always made us laugh."

"That Christmas, I remember him almost passing out with excitement at getting his Big Blue Gordon toy train, and how even though he was only toddling, he was already making up stories — with sound effects! — about his toys and their adventures."

"1. Baking a Mother's Day cake with him to give to you. He was both excited and nervous, and the batter was both lumpy and delicious. He decorated the entire thing himself, and I let my perfectionism go. I don't know if he'd ever baked a cake from scratch before, and I felt honored to do that with him. 2. His witty commentary during our viewings of The Bachelorette. I suspect he enjoyed those episodes as much as we did. He was quippy and sarcastic, much like his mom, and it was such a delight to see his personality come through. <3"

"I remember teaching him crazy dance moves in your living room under the guise that they were soccer exercises. He was so much fun and so great to be with."

"Just so many happy memories of our Yorkshire mini break: ‘Big Boy’ Danny clambering over rocks in his flip flops while you looked on half-amazed, half-terrified. Fun chats about life the world and all over our dinner and outings to sweet shops. He was also exceptionally sweet with Connie 💓."

"A few years ago Danny spent the weekend with us. We were watching a movie one night and the sound track was cool enough for us to watch the never-ending credits that roll at the end of the film: grip, assistant to the director's assistant, and on and on. I said to Danny something like: 'I wonder who pours the coffee for the assistant to the caterer?' And we were off and running. Danny came back with something like: 'How about the cream pourer, and the sugar spooner?' We were punch trunk when we finally exhausted the subject and ourselves."